Snow crunched under Tubbo’s feet, the frigid air biting at his face. He had forgotten his scarf at home, too panicked to bother looking for it. Ranboo had been gone for quite some time. Which normally wasn't unusual. But today Tubbo had woken up with a feeling that something was off. It started in the back of his mind, but by the time he was fixing Micheal dinner, it was gnawing at his stomach. So, he called up Tommy to watch Micheal and put him to bed, and hurried out the door. In hindsight, it was quite irrational. But he couldn't resist it. He knew he wouldn’t be able to rest until the feeling was gone. Which was why he was out so late looking for his husband.
It had been a few days since Ranboo and him had last spoken. And Tubbo had begun to worry that the enderman hybrid was in trouble. Sure their last conversation hadn’t been…pleasant. But that didn’t mean Tubbo thought differently of his beloved. And he knew Ranboo would always come back for Micheal. Even if Tubbo wasn’t in the equation, Ranboo would come home eventually.
So here he was wandering in the darkness. The snow was beginning to pick up a bit. His stomach grumbled, reminding him he had neglected to eat dinner. Or much at all today. He wished he had put on an extra pair of gloves. But he had forgotten that also. His mind only set on finding Ranboo. He knew he was outside of Snowchester quite a bit now. He had passed that border awhile back. There were a few torches scattered about. But otherwise it was completely dark. He thanked Prime for his ability to naturally see at night. He hoped he’d find his husband soon. It was late and cold, and he knew Ranboo was not built for the weather. He hoped wherever Ranboo was, at least he had his coat on.
It was after a bit more walking, that he realized where he was heading towards. The Prison. He wasn’t sure why that felt right. But his gut told him to keep going. The feeling of unease he had been feeling all day now had him by the neck. Something was incredibly wrong. He felt like he was being tugged forward by some invisible force. Like a string tugging on his heart. He hoped it was leading to his beloved. Because he did not want to think of what else it could possibly be pulling him towards. It was during this realization that he also remembered he hadn’t told Tommy when Micheals bedtime was. It was silly to think of, but he had been so eager to get out the door, that he had completely forgotten to tell Tommy anything really. Shaking his head, he decided that Tommy would figure it out on his own. It wasn’t like it was his first time watching Tubbo and Ranboo’s son.
He was starting to shiver more now. His teeth began to clatter together. He started walking faster. Calling out Ranboo’s name more loudly. He no longer cared who heard him. He just wanted to go home with his husband and curl up with his son. Was that too much to ask? He was hunched over huffing in the snow by the time he reached the prison. His eyes watery from the wind in his face. Tears streamed down his face. Oh god, why was he all the way out here? He always tried to stay away from the prison as much as possible. It always brought up bad memories. Not to mention why the prison was built. His chest hurt a bit from running in the cold. He could see his breath so clearly. Taking a deep breath, and shoving his hands in his pockets, he slowly got to his feet.
The Prison was a black mass of obsidian in the night. It blended it almost too well in the dark. No torches were around to light it up. Tubbo felt his heart hammering in his chest, terrified to know why he had been led here. Oh god was he hungry. He slowly edged towards the body of water that surrounded The Prison. Shocked to see that it had yet to freeze over. He stood on the shore, watching the water lap at his hooves. He felt dread creep into his mind. The water was calm. Almost peaceful to watch, under different circ*mstances.
Tubbo scanned the sea before him. His anxiety rising. That tugging that had led him here turned to nausea. He turned to walk down the shoreline. Moving slowly so he wouldn’t miss anything. It didn't take long for him to spot something long laying on the shore. As Tubbo got closer, he realized it was a person. …A very tall person…
Tubbo broke into a run, and knelt down by the body. Ranboo’s feet were subjected to being jostled by water. His arms limp beside him. Their body looked as if it had been dumped in a hurry. Tubbo immediately flipped them over onto their back. Only to be met with their eyes half open, and a slash across their chest. Blood stained their suit. Their skin felt raw from the water. Tubbo desperately grabbed their wrist to check for a pulse, despite knowing the answer. Ranboo was dead. And whoever had killed him, had done it and ran. Tubbo’s blood boiled. How dare they. How dare they just leave his husband to- to melt into the sea! The goat hybrid stood up, and carefully dragged Ranboo away from the water. He laid him in the snow softly, as if they were still alive. Pondering what his next move was gonna be. He hated how limp Ranboo’s body was. How there was no life in his eyes. Tubbo unzipped his coat and took it off, wrapping Ranboo’s body in it. After that was done he carefully picked the body up and began to walk home.
It was past midnight by the time Tubbo had finished digging the grave. He stared down at the empty six foot hole in the snow. He had tried his best to find a good spot for it, but he knew Ranboo wouldn’t want to be buried far from home. He threw the shovel down, letting himself finally have a break. He sat down on the edge of the hole, pulling his knees to his chest. He had grown numb to the cold by now. Whether rom adrenaline or the onset of hypothermia, he was unsure. The only sound now was that of the wind and the trees. Snowchester wasn’t exactly a lively place. But that was why Ranboo and Tubbo lived here. It was far removed from the greater SMP, meaning they would have less people (and the problems that came with them) to deal with. A strong gust of wind hit him, blinding him for a second. Gritting his teeth, Tubbo tried to ignore how hungry and cold he was. He knew he didn’t have the energy to go inside and make himself food. Even the simplest of meals was too much right now.
Tubbo closed his eyes and laid back in the snow, letting his boots dangle into the grave of his husband. Just a few minutes of rest wouldn't hurt…that's what Ranboo would say, right?
Yeah, yeah it was. He laid like that for a few minutes, dozing in and out of consciousness. He only awoke when he felt something tugging at his feet. He startled awake, and scrambled away from the empty grave. God how late was it? He knew whatever that was, was caused by sleep deprivation. There was no one else out here. Tommy and Micheal were safe inside the house. Tubbo was completely alone. With his husband's corpse…
Cautiously, he walked over to look at the body of his beloved. Ranboo was right where he had left them. It was only now that something occurred to Tubbo. Even if he buried Ranboos body near home…it could still be dug up. It could be found. And surely word would spread eventually that Ranboo was dead. He knew Wilbur would possibly come looking for his only employee. He knew people would ask questions. Yes, Tubbo and Ranboo tried to keep low profiles. But given their pasts, it wasn’t entirely easy to evade questioning. And whoever did this…what if they wanted to do it again? What if…what if someone wanted to bring Ranboo back to life? The thought made Tubbo ill. He knew there were some real sick f*cks on the SMP. He knew his husband had been wrapped up with some of those sick f*cks. Ranboo wouldn’t want to be brought back. He knew that much. He also knew that Ranboo didn’t deserve to be defiled in death. And Tubbo knew there was a chance. There was a chance someone may try to resurrect the enderman hybrid. He tried to think of what he could possibly do with the corpse. Him and Ranboo had never really thought to discuss what they wanted to happen to their bodies post mortem. For whatever reason the topic had just never come up. Now that he was staring at the corpse, he felt grief for all the unsaid words between them. For how distant he had felt they had become. It had been awhile since they had really had some time alone together. Tubbo felt like he had never let Ranboo know how much he had loved them. How Ranboo was his.
He knew Ranboo wouldn’t want to be burned. And he frankly didn’t have the heart to do it. He also knew letting him dissolve in the water would also be terrible. He pondered his options as he stared at his beloved’s lifeless face.
“What am I supposed to do?” he whined. “I can’t just bury you and hope no one digs you up…”
Tears welled in his eyes, but he quickly wiped them away. “I wish you knew how much I love you.”
It was then a twisted thought crossed his mind. He remembered awhile back how he had been reading some old journals he had found somewhere. Describing the practice of eating a loved one…surely…it wouldn’t hurt to try…
Tubbo carefully moved the hair out of Ranboo’s face, and got down on his knees. Cradling Ranboo’s face in his hands, he set a soft kiss on their forehead.
“Please forgive me, for what I have to do, Boo.”
He picked Ranboos' corpse up, and made his way to their house. The lights were off, Tubbo had to set Ranboo down for a minute while he unlocked the door. His hands shook as he did so, knowing this wasn’t gonna be pretty. He pushed the front door open slowly, making sure it wouldn't squeak. After listening for a few minutes, he figured Tommy was up in Micheals loft with him. Probably asleep. Tubbo took a deep breath and turned to pick Ranboo back up. He carried them inside the house, bridal style. Reminding him of the day they had officially gotten married. At a small ceremony, with only Eret as a priest and witness. They had both been so happy and alive that day. Tubbo had swept Ranboo off their feet when they approached home. Proclaiming that not even death could separate them. It was Ironic, like the rest of Tubbo’s life. Slowly they went up the stairs, and down the hall to their bedroom. Once there, Tubbo set Ranboo on the bed, splaying out their arms and legs neatly. And he stared. And stared. The rumbling of his stomach was the only sound. And as far as Tubbo was concerned, it was the loudest. It…wasn’t exactly the best option for Ranboo’s body. But…it was better than being brought back all wrong. And…it would show how much Tubbo loved him. They may be dead, but that didn’t mean Tubbo couldn’t at least try to convey it one last time. R-right? Maybe- maybe this would just be their version of becoming one. Tubbo grimaced. God. How am I going to explain this if anyone finds out? He shook his head, deciding he would figure that out later. He crept out into the kitchen and grabbed a fork and the sharpest knife he could find. Surely this wouldn’t be too different from carving up a cow or pig…Ranboo was still where he let them when he came back. He set the fork and knife down then went to grab a tarp from the basem*nt. After setting up, Tubbo finally grabbed the fork and knife and crawled onto the bed next to his beloved. He closed Ranboo’s eyes, and said a prayer to a god he wasn’t sure if he believed in. He placed his knife on Ranboo’s arm and started cutting. He knew the coldness of Snowchester would keep the body fresh for awhile, but he didnt want to take any chances. So he started cutting up Ranboo’s left arm, slicing the flesh off the bone into fine lines. The muscle falling away in red juicy chunks. Slowly he cut, as to not cut himself. After a while, Tubbo decided to just go for it. He set the knife down, and brought the arm to his mouth. Biting into the cold flesh, he felt a well of emotions that had been thrown to the side since he had found the body. Fear, pain, betrayal, sadness. He became lost in the moment, as his teeth sank into muscle. Blood welled up in his mouth as he tore a piece of meat away. He couldn't place the taste, but it was…odd. He wasn’t sure what to have been expecting, he often heard that people tasted like chicken. This was not true for Ranboo obviously. His skin was raw from the damage of the water. But otherwise, he tasted like…squid? Or something like that. He bit off another piece after he had finished swallowing. Cut, bite, chew, swallow, repeat. And on and on it went. After that arm was mostly bone, Tubbo got to the strips he had first cut off. They were juicy and succulent, and he savored the taste despite himself. Blood ran down his mouth, his hands streaked in purple. Tubbo couldn’t help but be a bit curious about Ranboo's biology. It had always been something he wanted to know more about, but knew how uncomfortable that would make his beloved. He hoped Ranboo didn’t mind how unorthodox his autopsy was.
When he was done with the left arm, he moved to the other arm. He repeated the process of slicing meat tenderly off the arm, and then began gnawing on it. The room was dead silent. There was some slight movement from the loft upstairs, but Tubbo paid it no mind. Time was nonexistent. He took his sweet time, pulling strips of meat off the arm, savoring each bite. The blood made it all the more juicy. Tubbo found that the meat on his husband was quite tender. There wasn’t much fat on it, which really helped with the texture. After cleaning another arm off, he found himself getting drowsy. Sleep would do him some good, and he knew the meat wasn’t going anywhere. In a quick moment of deliberation, Tubbo decided he was going to save the organs for last. He took the knife and sliced into Ranboo’s chest. It took a few minutes, but he managed to pry open the ribcage. Slowly and methodically he began to rubbage around, feeling for organs. He pulled out their lungs, intestines, liver, kidneys, stomach, and the like. Making a neat pile of them to store. He decided he would save the heart for last. Tubbo then made a quick trip to the kitchen once more, and pulled out a large garbage bag. He proceeded to race back to the bedroom and toss whatever he had pulled out of Ranboo into it. This he would hide until he got around to eating it. After he crawled back onto the bed and took a few nibbles of Ranboos fingers. They didn’t taste that bad, but he was finally ready to fall asleep. He collapsed next to the corpse, his hands entwined with what was left of Ranboo.
“I hope you can forgive me.”
Tubbo looked down at his hooves. Ashamed. He knew last night's activities were wrong. He knew how disgusting it was. But he could not help but feel like it was the best option. He couldn’t help but enjoy it. And Ranboo knew this. “I didn’t mean for it to go that far.” Liar. Ranboo could see right through him, and knew that Tubbo had intended to go much farther.
“You…You don’t have to apologize…” they said finally.
“Yes I do!” cried Tubbo. “I- I could’ve buried you in a nice little grave behind our house. I could have handled this normally and rationally. But I…I don’t know why I did that…”
Ranboo looked utterly distressed. “I know you weren't in your right mind…”
They were right. Tubbo had never felt more lost and horrified. “I’m so sorry!” he sobbed. Ranboo wrapped their arms around him.
“It’s…it’s okay, Bee. At least we can be together forever now…”
Tubbo woke up in the same position he fell asleep in. Sunlight filtered through the curtains. He groaned, feeling a bit sick from last night's gorging. He spotted the bag of organs he had left in the corner, and decided he should probably put it somewhere safe. Sluggish he crawled out of bed and got to his feet. He wasn’t used to eating that much, especially in one sitting. The room smelled of blood, which Tubbo tried to ignore as he picked up the trash bag of his husband's remains, and snuck out of the room. It was early enough that neither Tommy or Micheal were up yet, which he was eternally grateful for. He pulled on his coat and boots, and trekked over to his lab. Knowing Tommy wouldn’t venture in here, he unlocked the door and put the bag in the lab's freezer. It would be good enough for now. When he got back home, he went back to his room, and started cutting up the legs. He was still hungry. He needed to satiate it. He was full of guilt, and pain, but he was still hungry. It was when he was done cutting up the first leg into slices that he heard life in the house. Muffled voices upstairs in the loft. Michaels little feet pit pattering across the floor. Tubbo so badly wanted to go up and greet his son. But knew he could not do that since he was still covered in blood. And the remains of his poor boy's father.
Ranboo’s legs were much more tasteful than their arms. Sure they weren't as built as Tubbo’s, but they were more juicy and filling. He ate a number of the slices he had, and was in the middle of doing so when there was a knock on his door.
“Tubbo! Big man! Did you find Ranboo last night?”
Tubbo gulped down a tendon, almost choking. He coughed, hitting his chest a few times, before he called back. “Yeah! Yeah I did, Big man.” His voice shaky, he couldn't let Tommy come in here. What- what would he say? What would he think? He’d say Tubbo had lost his goddamn mind. And Tubbo would have no choice but to agree.
“I’m gonna start on breakfast, is Ranboo okay?”
I have to tell him Ranboo’s dead-
“Uh- I’ll be down in a bit!” Yelled Tubbo. Stuffing more meat into his mouth, as reality dawned on him. He was really eating his husband's corpse. He had dug a grave out last night. But no- he had decided to eat the body. And he had a feeling that at this rate…it wouldn’t take him long.
'You should really tell him I’m dead.'
Tubbo scanned the room, trying to figure out who exactly had said that.
'Tubbo, it’s just me, Ranboo.'
“Okay conscience, we get it. I ate my husband- you don’t need to do that-”
He heard the voice laugh. 'You’ve really got yourself into a messy situation this time, dear. Maybe you should take a break and go check on Micheal.'
There was no way this was happening. He was just going crazy. Or- or maybe it was that one disease that you can get from eating raw meat- maybe-
'Tubbo, honey I know this is insane, but it really is me.'
“No…” Tubbo shook his head. “You’re dead…”
'Yep! Sorry about that.'
“What the f*ck is going on- have i actually lost my mind?”
'I think it’s debatable,' Ranboo- not Ranboo? Mused.
'but no, I’m actually talking to you.'
Tubbo looked down at the piece of meat in his hands and cringed. Ranboo bristled.
'You uh- you sure went to town, honey'
“Don’t even try to make me feel better” grumbled Tubbo.
Ranboo sighed 'It’s my fault for dying'
“Do you hear yourself right now? You’re dead! How the hell is that your fault?”
'Well I…I should've told you some things…'
Tubbo started chuckling. Oh this was really happening. Oh god. This was happening. His chuckling soon devolved into full blown hysterical laughter.
Ranboo was dead. He had eaten him. He had pulled out their organs and stored them in the freezer of his lab. And now he was hearing his voice in his head. The whole situation was pretty funny when he thought about it. He was just cackling uncontrollably for a while. Stitches in his sides and his stomach hurting. But he kept on laughing. He fell off the bed, causing him to only laugh louder. Suddenly he felt a sudden squeezing around his midsection. It startled him, causing him to stop laughing.
Sorry I was trying to hug you said Ranboo, sounding a bit sad.
Tubbo hesitated. Unsure of what to think, he sat there confused.
There was a loud knock on the bedroom door. “Tubbo?! What the f*ck are you doing in there?”
'Tubbo I think Tommy’s gonna kick down the door if you don’t answer.' Tubbo knew Ranboo was right about that. Tommy would and probably kick down the door. "I’m going to answer the door covered in blood? Ranboo do you know how that will go over?"
……..
"I need to shower and hide the…evidence"
'I don’t think Tommy is gonna leave you alone until you tell him what's going on-'
"Yeah? Well what am i gonna tell him when I open that door? That I found your dead body and decided I should eat you instead of burying you??"
'…He’ll appreciate the honesty…'
Tubbo sighed, running his hands through his hair. He stood up and walked over to the mirror hanging on the wall. There was blood splattered on his face, dripping down his mouth. It was also on his clothes, along with other bodily fluids. There were also chunks of flesh sticking to his coat. There were also streaks of dirt on his clothes, stained with it from last night's digging. Blood and dirt was streaked in his hair and fur. All he felt was disgust at the sight of himself. His hands were actually a bit clean, because he had washed his hands before going to his lab so as to not contaminate anything. Otherwise he was covered in evidence of his sins. Ranboo hummed.
'Tell Tommy you didn’t sleep well and you need a shower, and then you guys can talk'
Tubbo didn’t like that the voice inside his head was being more logical than he had been in the past twelve hours. But he couldn’t argue with Ranboo’s idea. Surely it wouldn't be unusual if Tubbo had gotten dirtied up while looking for them last night. There was another knock at the door, sounding more impatient than the last.
“Tubbo I swear to Prime, I will kick this door down.”
“I-I need to shower and change real quick! Then I’ll be down to talk.”
Tubbo held his breath in, waiting for a response. Finally Tommy answered, this time sounding more worried than inpatient.
“Did something happen last night?...”
“No!” Tubbo yelled panicky. Then raced towards the door.
“Please don’t come in, I uh- got the place dirty-”
“I don’t care about that- did you find Ranboo?”
Oh yeah I found them alright. You're just not gonna like how.
“Um- I don’t want to talk about it right now. Just uh- feed micheal, I’ll be down in a bit.”
Tommy huffed,“I don’t like when you get all cryptic.”
“I promise you, I’ll tell you everything. I just need to shower.”
Almost everything…
“Alright…I don’t like this. But I’m trusting you Tubbo.” Tubbo heard the sound of Tommy starting to walk away, calling back; “You better be down here in twenty, or I’m kicking the door down!”
Classic Tommy.
"What the f*ck am I gonna tell him?"
'I’m…not quite sure yet…'
“How- why are you in my head? Are you like a ghost?”
'Hm, that is weird actually. I think…it may be because you…ate me…?'
“How- why?”
'I don’t know man, I mean like, the soul is tied to the body.'
“Yeah but…I didn’t like eat you right away- so like is it a timed thing?”
'I don’t know…I think you should go get that shower and clean up. Please don’t let Micheal see you like this.'
Tubbo rolled his eyes. “I would never do that to Micheal, Boo. He deserves to keep his innocence for as long as possible.”
Tubbo opened the door and made sure the coast was clear before bolting to the bathroom. He got a quick shower, making sure to get all the blood and everything else off of him. Watching the blood swirl into the drainpipe was somewhat mesmerizing. He hated it. When he was done he changed into a fresh pair of clothes and brushed his teeth,making sure to get any meat that was stuck in them out. When he was satisfied with his appearance, he strolled downstairs. Tommy was sitting on the couch with Micheal, some sort of cartoon on the tv. Tubbo noticed how Tommy looked suspiciously at him when he approached.
“Papa!” cried Micheal, grabbing at his hands.
“Hey buddy! How you doing?” asked Tubbo, sitting down next to his son.
“Good. Ancle Tommy and I are watching cartoons!”
“I can see! Has Ancle Tommy been taking good care of you?”
“Yeah! They made waffles!”
Tubbo smiled and ruffled Micheals hair. Micehal took this as an invitation to snuggle into his papa. Tubbo didn’t object to this, and was a bit glad he had waited on eating the rest of ranboo’s corpse.
‘So…” began Tommy. “When can we talk about last night?”
“Oh um- in a bit.”
“Hm.”
Tubbo wrapped his arms around Micheal and pulled him to his chest. He felt horrible that he was gonna have to tell his little boy that Ranboo was dead.
'Maybe…hold off on it for a day till you get yourself together.'
I hate that you're right. I feel like I'm going insane.
Tubbo let himself sink into the couch and closed his eyes.
He just wanted to stay in this moment, and pretend nothing was wrong whatsoever. But he knew he couldn’t do that. The credits for the show eventually rolled and Tubbo was pulled out of his stupor by the theme song. He nuzzled Micheals head and hugged him tightly before telling him he had to have an adult conversation with Tommy.
“I’ll be back in a bit buddy, then we can cuddle more,” he promised, hoping he could keep it.
Tommy got up and motioned for Tubbo to follow him. They went upstairs to stay out of earshot of Micheal.
“You gonna tell me why you were acting weird this morning?, and where the hell is Ranboo?”
Tubbo cringed at how upset Tommy looked. He took a deep breathe, his mind racing with how to begin to explain.
“I uh- I went looking for Ranboo last night. And I eventually ended up on the shore near the prison…”
Tommy nodded for him to go on.
“And uh- well…I found…I found Ranboo’s dead body…”
Tubbo really didn’t want to see the way Tommy’s face fell. How his eyes grew sad.
“What do you mean?? Who killed him?”
“I don’t know! I just found him lying on the shore. I’m as furious as you are-”
“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?”
“I-” Tubbo felt like throwing up.
Tommy clenched his fists.
“God, I…Prime Tubbo, I’m so sorry.”
They stood there in silence for a few minutes. Finally Tommy spoke.
“So uh, where is the body?”
Tubbo gulped. “I…um…”
'It’s okay, dear. Just say I was mostly melted already.'
That’s- terrifying-
'Better than telling them the truth, right?'
Tubbo wanted to scream.
“It- There wasn’t much I could salvage.”
The look of horror on Tommy’s face broke him, but it was way better than telling his best friend the truth.
“Oh Prime- he must’ve been there for a while…”
“Yeah…”
Tommy pulled him into a hug, letting tubbo bury his face in their sweater.
They stayed like that for a while. It took everything in Tubbo to not start bawling his eyes out and confessing his sins. What type of sick person immediately jumps to eating their husband?
When Tommy finally pulled away, Tubbo could see the tears in their eyes.
“We’re gonna kill whoever killed them. You hear me?”
Tubbo nodded in agreement. They were gonna kill whoever murdered his beloved. He was going to get revenge for once.
Tommy needed some time to think and after making sure Tubbo was okay, retreated to their room. Tubbo went back to cuddle with Micheal, trying to put the whole ordeal out of his mind. Micheal happily resumed cuddling and eventually fell asleep on Tubbo.
'He really has you in a death grip' joked Ranboo. Tubbo smirked. I wonder where he gets it from.
'So do I.'
Can I try hugging you again?
Sure?
The squeezing sensation was back, only tighter this time. Tubbo felt like someone was trying to squeeze the air out of him. His breathe caught in his throat for a minute, causing Ranboo to stop.
'Am I hurting you?'
Just a bit…
Tubbo felt waves of concern wash over him.
'I’m sorry, I don’t really know what I’m doing.'
He could hear the confusion in Ranboo’s voice. Tubbo looked around, feeling like he wasn’t sure where he was for a moment.
'Maybe you should go lay down, maybe eat something…'
As if on cue, Tubbo’s stomach growled.
I’m going to kill you if you did that.
'I actually did not. Dear, you often forget you have four stomachs and never eat enough.'
Tubbo had to stop himself from getting defensive, he knew Ranboo was just trying to look out for him. But there was some sick irony in that. Was he really going to go back to his room after putting Micheal to bed later- and eat more of Ranboo’s body?
He looked down at his hands, the same hands who ripped open his husband's rib cage and spilled his organs into a trash bag. Who hid that trash bag-
Something squeezed his hand.
'Do what you gotta do…I don’t mind'
Another wave of emotion washed over him. Sorrow, regret?
“You don’t- you don’t mind if i…finish you?”
'Honey, I'm dead. It’s not like I'm using it anymore.'
“But…how are you so calm?!” cried Tubbo. “I don’t understand!”
'Shh, it's okay. Calm down, someones gonna hear you.'
“Doesn’t matter, I’m already losing my mind.”
'You gotta stay strong for Micheal. He adores you. Also there's no way Tommy could take care of him properly.'
Tubbo had to bite back his laughter. They were right, Tommy was a good babysitter, but they weren’t meant for parenthood. And he was a bit tired, maybe some sleep and a snack would do good for clearing his mind. And if Ranboo was okay with it…then what harm could it do? Feeling a bit more relaxed, he started back up the stairs and to his room. What remained of Ranboo’s body laid on the bed. Tubbo didn’t mind having to do all the bedding eventually. It was on his list of things to do anyway. He crawled onto the bed and picked up his knife, looking for a good place to cut in. He decided to continue cutting up the leg he had been working on when he had been interrupted. He spent awhile cutting more slices off the bone before tearing in. Ranboo hummed.
'Wouldn’t it be easier to eat off the bone…like a chicken leg?'
Tubbo shook his head. “No, I don’t like doing that as much. You’re quite boney and I'm paranoid about biting the bone.”
'How do I taste ?'
“Um…” He wasn’t sure how to answer. “Good?”
'Oh no, do I taste bad? Asked Ranboo horrified.'
“No! I just- don’t know how to describe it. And this is just so weird.”
'I understand. Sorry I just was curious. I just its natural to wonder what oneself tastes like'
Tubbo chuckled.
“I guess.”
They sat in silence as Tubbo ate. Trying to ignore the fact that Ranboo was watching this all. He didn’t want to think about the implications yet. He needed to be in a clearer headspace first. He finished off that leg, and curled up on the bed, wiggling under the covers.
“You're not gonna like- watch my dreams, right?”
Ranboo felt as curious as tubbo did. Or was it the other way around?
'I uh…I don’t know?'
"Okay well…don’t say I didn’t warn you if I get night terrors.”
'I hope that doesn’t happen. Just remember I'm here, okay?'
Tubbo wasn’t sure if he should be comforted by that or not.
The sunset was beautiful. Tubbo couldn’t help but stare at it. He leaned back in ranboo’s arms. Micheal was asleep on the picnic blanket, tuckered out from the hike there. Ranboo tilted their head and pecked him on the cheek.
“We should get going soon.”
“Just a few more minutes, Boo” he murmured, wanting to cherish the moment forever. He hadn’t felt this at peace in awhile. Micheal looked so comfortable, and Tubbo hated to wake him up.
Ranboo sighed, “a few minutes, but it’s gonna be getting dark. I know you hate being out late.”
Tubbo groaned. He usually didn’t mind being out late, but he hated being out late with his family. It was too dangerous. He could care less if something happened to him alone.
They sat and watched the sunset for a few more minutes, before Ranboo let go of him and started to get up. Tubbo twisted around and pulled their face back down. They looked confused for a second, smiling. Tubbo gave them a quick kiss before letting them go. Ranboo’s eyes going alight, their cheeks blushing for a second. Tubbo smirked. And who said he couldn’t be romantic?
Ranboo winked at him before bending down and carefully picking up Micheal. Tubbo gathered up the food and dishes and began to pack it away. Still watching the sunset. When he turned back to look at his family, they were bathed in golden light. He had never felt more at home.
It was dark out when Tubbo awoke. He felt well rested for once. Smiling at the memory of that picnic. He sat up and looked over the corpse next to him.
'That was…a nice day.'
“It was, wasn’t it,” Tubbo sighed, wistfully.
'Are you feeling a bit better now?'
“Yeah…”
Tubbo felt a bit sad…disturbed, while looking over the corpse. Ranboo cleared his throat, seeming to try to get Tubbo’s mind back on track.
'Maybe you should like…store the rest for the time being…'
Tubbo frowned at the thought. It was bad enough their organs were already frozen. But he couldn’t just keep the body for days on end.
“Maybe…”
'Tubbo,' cautioned Ranboo. 'I’m just a bit worried now, because I don’t want you developing any unhealthy coping mechanisms-'
“Yeah, It’s a bit too late for that, Ranboo.”
With that Tubbo began cutting into the other leg. He tried to ignore Ranboo’s fretting as he did so. He just wanted to finish this. Who knew how much time he had before someone found out?
This time Tubbo didn’t bother so much with cutting them into small slices. Soon he had a whole stack of leg meat beside him. Ranboo blanched, making him feel a bit faint at the sight.
'Maybe you should just go eat some grass?' They weakly suggested.
Tubbo ignored them, shoving a slice into his mouth. He could feel Ranboo’s horror. And he couldn’t blame them, but he could not keep doing this. He had to finish this soon. On the fourth slice he decided to wring out the meat a little, letting the blood pool. He sucked it up before shoving another slice into his mouth. With each bite and cut Ranboo’s horror only mounted. Tubbo started to feel more anxious as it did. He was dripping sweat by the end of it. Feeling nauseous at the sight of the two leg bones that had been cleaned of their meat
'What are you doing?' Ranboo asked, concerned.
Tubbo had woken up in the middle of the night, unable to sleep, and had decided to get a snack. He was digging around in Ranboo’s chest cavity now because he craved something different. It had been two days since he had found the body, and he had already stripped it of most of its meat.
“Here it is!” Tubbo pulled out what seemed to be Ranboo’s heart. It was cold and purple. They both cringed in disgust.
'Your…going to eat my heart?'
Tubbo gave it a squeeze before answering, “should I not?”
He felt suddenly uncomfortable and a bit afraid.
'It’s uh…a little weird…but I’m more concerned it’s safe to eat.'
“Why wouldn’t it be?”
'Well…I don’t know…'
“You didn’t object when I ate your lungs.”
'Yeah but…'
“It’s not like it’s the brain, I actually read that the heart is pretty healthy to eat.”
'When did you read up on cannibalism?'
Ranboo actually shouldn't've been shocked, but at the same time, he understood why the thought made feel uneasy.
“It was just general research a while back. This was not preplanned.”
'Good to know?'
'Just be careful.'
Noted.
Tubbo got to work cutting the heart into manageable pieces. He remembered how Quackity had told him he had eaten Schlatt’s heart. Out of spite and anger of course. That f*cker meant nothing but pain to everyone he ever met. Tubbo couldn’t judge the duck for his decision.
This time though, a heart was being eaten because of genuine love. Tubbo felt a bit queasy at the sight of blood spurting from the arteries. He noticed Ranboo had more of those than a human.
'I’m partly surprised your not writing stuff down. I don’t think enderman hybrid anatomy has really been explored yet.'
Tubbo stiffened up.
“This isn’t for research.”
'I know, I’m just a bit shocked.'
“You're my husband, not some- some test subject! You're not a random body I dug up. Besides, you always hated the idea of being studied.”
Ranboo fell silent after that.
Tubbo finally bit into a chunk of heart, and was disturbed to find it to be one of the most delicious things he’d ever tasted. It was all muscle. Not too chewy, not too tough. Blood spurted between his teeth as he bit off an artery. The liquid rushed down his throat, leaving a sweet taste in his mouth. It didn’t take long for him to devour the whole thing. He couldn’t help but fall into a daze. The same daze he had been in when he had begun this process.
He licked his lips and fingers clean when he was done, satisfied with his meal. His stomach, on the other hand, was not feeling the same way.
'I told you I had a bad feeling about that.'
Tubbo grimaced as his stomach began to cramp up. Curling in on himself and laid on the bed, hoping the pain wouldn’t last long. It felt like his organs were all fighting for dominance. Shifting inside of him. The room was so cold, he felt like he was actually gonna vomit. It was dark, and he wasn’t sure what time it was, just that he was in agony for a while. Finally the vomit came. He almost fell off the bed while retching. Everything spilled out, a big pile of purplish slop pooling on the floor. It went on for a good few minutes. His body trying to purge everything. At the end of it he was left dry heaving on the edge of his bed, trying to keep his eyes open. Everything hurt, and he was so tired. He laid there on the edge of the bed, hoping it was over.
'Oh god, maybe you should go get help'
Tubbo weakly shook his head. “And tell the-hic m what?”
Ranboo was panicking and tubbo did not appreciate how it was only making him feel worse. His anxiety was high and he couldn’t tell which thoughts were his own.
'I’m sorry I’ll try to calm down. I’m just worried about you.'
Tubbo was going to say something but threw up again. He then pulled himself up, and rolled onto his back. I just need to sleep, and maybe take some healing potions. He stared up at the ceiling, eyes growing heavy. He wanted to run out of his skin. He was so tired and scared.
'Think of that evening with me and michael. Pretend you're there. You're warm and safe and loved.'
An image of that sunset conjured in his mind. He started to relax a bit. He could feel the warmth. Ranboo’s arms around him. He was okay. He was going to be okay.
“Who killed you, Boo?” Tubbo asked randomly the next day.
'I uh…'Ranboo seemed hesitant. Tubbo winced as he moved around, pacing he presumed by the feel of it.
'I think it was…I think it was Sam…or maybe Techno?'
Tubbo’s mouth dropped open. He was in disbelief that Ranboo actually knew. He was not shocked at the suspect list at all.
“Why…why were you at the prison?”
He was a bit nervous to hear this answer. A bit scared. Ranboo seemed to sense this as he took his time choosing his words.
'I uh…Something happened. And i-'
They stopped suddenly.
'I think we should talk about this when you're in a better headspace.'
Tubbo didn’t like the sound of that. He knew, he could feel Ranboo was hiding something from him.
“You know I can tell you're hiding something right? I can feel how anxious you are.”
There was a moment of silence. Tubbo sat there, uncomfortable in his skin.
'I asked Sam to put me in the prison.'
“Why?”
Was all Tubbo could say. Feeling half delirious, he listened.
'Because….I needed to be in there for everyone’s safety.'
“What the f*ck do you mean? You would never- you’ve never-“
'Tubbo-'
“No- no don’t interrupt me when I’m freaking out like that. Okay? I’ve had the most irrational past few days. I deserve to lose my mind a bit.”
His legs felt wobbly, and he could tell it was because of how anxious Ranboo was.
“What did you do, Boo? Please just tell me.”
'Well I- I’m not entirely sure what I did. Dream he- he got into my head. It was like I wasn’t in control sometimes…'
“He…why did you never-”
'Because I didn’t want to scare you. I know how much that monster has hurt you and Tommy. I…I was trying to keep you safe.'
Tubbo felt like his world was off kilter.
“...what did you do?”
'I don’t know! That's the problem. That's why I begged Sam to put me in the prison.'
“Then- then why did he kill you?”
'I don’t think he trusted or believed me. He knew Techno and Dream had broken me out. So…I guess he just thought I deserved it.'
“...oh”
Then.
“Wait, a second- Dream escaped?”
There was silence between them.
'No. No he didn’t. He’s dead, dear.'
A beat.
Realization hit the goat hybrid slowly. As if his brain couldn’t comprehend that their main torturer was dead. Gone. Couldn’t hurt them anymore.
“You didn’t think this was important information?”
'I forgot…it’s been an odd few days.'
Tubbo sighed, head falling into his hands. He brought his knees up to his chin, slowly rocking back and forth.
Yes, the last few days had been odd. So odd that he felt like he couldn’t keep up anymore. His mind was racing still. Dream was dead. That was good. Wonderful. He didn’t need to worry about that bastard harming his Tommy ever again.
Sam however…
'Tubbo?'
Sam thinks he can murder Ranboo in cold blood and get away with it? He thinks that I won’t retaliate? That I’m going to be a helpless widow?
'Tubbo?'
He uncurled slowly, looking around the room. This house. This was their house. The house they had shared together. The house they had worked so hard to protect. The house where they raised their son. Who didn’t deserve to lose his father this young.
Well, Sam has another thing coming.
He got to his feet, ignoring the anxiety that filled him.
'Tubbo?'
Ignoring the confusion and fear that clouded his mind over, he made his way to the front door and put his boots and coat on.
“Tom?” he called out.
The blonde poked their head out from the kitchen.
“Yeah?”
“I’m going to run an errand, keep an eye on Micheal, okay?”
Tommy nodded, ‘you got it, big man.”
Tubbo pretended not to notice the concern on Tommy’s face. Everything was fine. He was going to fix this.
'Tubbo you can’t just go and kill Sam.'
“Why the hell are you so against it?” Tubbo growled, stepping out into the snow. The front door slamming shut behind him. The door that was reinforced to protect his family from whatever lurked outside.
'I…you're not going to eat him, are you?'
He paused for a moment, “no. No, I do not want Sam in my head. Especially now that I know he killed you.”
Ranboo didn’t say anything.
The trek through Snowchester was full of tension. It didn’t help that Tubbo was craving to have some of Ranboo right about now. It was probably unhealthy that he had been stress eating his husband's corpse…but he wasn’t sure what else to do. Ranboo was oddly quiet until they were out of Snowchester.
'Can you- at least try not to get caught?'
Tubbo snorted.
“You're worried I’m going to get spotted, aren't you?”
'You don’t have the most…good reputation around here.'
“Yeah well, it’s their own faults. Besides, I doubt I’ll run into anyone at The Prison.”
He was retracing his steps from the night he had found Ranboo. The night he had begun to lose his mind. It was bright out this time, the torches along the path rendered nearly invisible. He listened to the birds chirping, keeping an ear out for any human-like noises. He knew it was dangerous to venture too far from home. He knew there were half a dozen people on this server who would jump at the chance to maim or kill him. But the hunger for vengeance was too strong. When he finally reached The Prison, there was a sense of melancholy that hung in the air. The obsidian structure had taken so much from him. And he had never stepped a hoof inside.
Tommy had lost their life and dignity here. Ranboo had been locked up for almost no reason, and murdered. Tubbo knew Sam was never too far from The Prison. The man practically lived here. It sickened him at the thought that the same man who had taken his husband's life, had barely tried to get Tommy away from their abuser.
He pulled out his communicator, scrolling down until he found Sam. He hadn’t contacted the creeper hybrid in ages. The fact that he had once trusted this man-
'Relax, honey. It’s okay.'
It was like a weight was wrapped around him. Like a hug. He shook his head, trying not to get distracted. The light above Sam’s name indicated he was online. Before Ranboo could stop him, Tubbo quickly typed a message.
T: I’m outside The Prison and I need your help
It was simple. It gave nothing away. And it sounded like something he would’ve typed when he was younger. When he had used to ask Sam for help. He would lure Sam out, making him think Tubbo wasn’t aware of his crimes. And then- then he would tear the man to pieces. He felt the knife he had slipped into his pocket before leaving, feeling the blade with his fingers. He stood there waiting for a response, staring at his communicator as if he could will Sam to respond. Finally, after ten minutes, his communicator beeped loudly.
S: Tubbo? I’m almost back to The Prison, I’ll be there in a minute.
Tubbo smiled wolfishly, pulling his hood up over his head. He watched as the creeper hybrid came running out of nowhere, a confused expression on his face.
“Tubbo! What on earth are you doing here?”
A shiver went down Tubbo’s spine, as it set in what he was about to do.
“I’m looking for Ranboo actually, he was supposed to help me with something but I haven't heard from him in awhile.”
Sam looked taken aback, but composed himself quickly. His facial expression remained neutral.
“I haven't seen Ranboo in awhile.”
Tubbo slipped his hand into his pocket, wrapping his fingers around his knife.
“Really?”
“Yeah, sorry about that. I thought you meant you were actually in trouble.” Sam laughed a bit.
Tubbo tried to keep up the act, but he gritted his teeth at that.
“Huh, well actually, I do need a bit of your help.”
“Oh?”
Tubbo lunged at Sam in one quick motion, grabbing the mans neck in one hand, and shoving the knife toward him with the other. The momentum sent them both crashing to the ground. Sam tried to push Tubbo off, but Tubbo bit down hard on his arm.
“WHAT THE f*ck?!” the man screeched. The noise was music to Tubbo’s ears. He tore off a chunk of flesh and spat it out onto the ground. He jammed the knife into Sam’s neck while the man was still distracted. He tried to kick Tubbo off of him, but Tubbo had gained quite a bit of muscle since the last time they had met. He twisted the knife, watching as the light went out of the man’s eyes. Eventually his body stopped twitching, and Tubbo felt comfortable enough to get up. He stared down at the corpse, that chill in his spine back.
'Tubbo… 'said Ranboo, shocked.
Tubbo licked his lips, “you think a little nibble is okay?”
'No! Do not nibble off of the man you just murdered!'
Tubbo sighed, “alright, fine.” He huffed and pulled out the box of matches, and the bottle of gasoline he had swiped from his house. After dousing the body in gasoline, he lit a match and flicked it onto the corpse. It erupted into flames almost instantly. Tubbo stood staring at, mesmerized by the flames. The smell of burning flesh filled his nostrils. The numbness that he had been operating on for days now, had turned to a slight calm. Everything was going to be okay.
'Let’s go home, Bee' whispered Ranboo. 'It isn’t safe here.'
That snapped Tubbo out of his stupor.
“Yeah- yeah let’s go home.”
He made sure there was no evidence of him having been here, and started back the direction he had come from. His stomach grumbled a bit as he neared Snowchester, his mouth beginning to drool at the thought of whatever was left of Ranboo.
